My goodness.

Kinja'd!!! "Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To" (murdersofa)
04/23/2019 at 23:29 • Filed to: None

Kinja'd!!!2 Kinja'd!!! 48

These are unreasonably inexpensive. 2 liter turbo AWD manual luxury coupe. These are all words the Jake enjoys.

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DISCUSSION (48)


Kinja'd!!! 2Fast2Furious: Rotary Powered > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/23/2019 at 23:33

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Its because it's a VW, it's lived it useable life times 5 by now


Kinja'd!!! MrDakka > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/23/2019 at 23:34

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Nearly a decade old.

AWD

Turbo

German

Why aren’t you running for the hills?


Kinja'd!!! Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > MrDakka
04/23/2019 at 23:37

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Because Jake’s luck sucks with reliable cars, so by that logic, this should last him 1 million miles.


Kinja'd!!! PS9 > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/23/2019 at 23:38

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What?

That has to be some kind of mistake. I can’t afford any Audi, especially a nice one like that. The price has to be wrong somehow. 


Kinja'd!!! Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > PS9
04/23/2019 at 23:42

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this is my exact words. there’s an automatic one with <100k miles locally for $11k. My brain is broken.

Surely they’re not that bad if you do the work yourself...

Surely...

gonna go buy a triplesquare bit set brb


Kinja'd!!! Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/23/2019 at 23:45

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And you thought an old Lexus was unreliable... disgunbegood.gif


Kinja'd!!! Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
04/23/2019 at 23:53

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Have we all so quickly forgotten his Jag?


Kinja'd!!! bob and john > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
04/23/2019 at 23:54

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here is the thing, he has HORRID luck with reliable cars....so, he might have GREAT luck with unreliables ones. 


Kinja'd!!! Future Heap Owner > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/23/2019 at 23:55

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You’ve gotta have run through all your bad luck by now. Do it!


Kinja'd!!! Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
04/23/2019 at 23:55

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The 350 was the most unreliable part.


Kinja'd!!! shop-teacher > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/23/2019 at 23:56

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Yeah, what could possibly go wrong?


Kinja'd!!! CompactLuxuryFan > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/23/2019 at 23:58

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Don’t look at E92 prices, then. 


Kinja'd!!! Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
04/23/2019 at 23:59

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Well, when you buy a car from a guy who did an engine swap with presumably both eyes sewn shut, what can you expect.


Kinja'd!!! Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > bob and john
04/24/2019 at 00:01

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To be fair, the Paseo hasn’t really been unreliable at all... He fixed a couple of known issues then his wife has a spinout on some ice. Still being driven today! As for the LS...

[Sticks fingers in ears]

Lalalalalala....


Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 00:10

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What could possibly go wrong?


Kinja'd!!! If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 00:11

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Yeah hun there's a reason it's cheap.


Kinja'd!!! bob and john > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
04/24/2019 at 00:15

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it was a chevy 350, in theory, those survive nukes. 


Kinja'd!!! Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
04/24/2019 at 00:15

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impossible


Kinja'd!!! Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
04/24/2019 at 00:15

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absolutely nothing I already own a triple-square bit set


Kinja'd!!! Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > CompactLuxuryFan
04/24/2019 at 00:15

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that’s ok I personally think E92s are hideous.


Kinja'd!!! Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > shop-teacher
04/24/2019 at 00:16

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on a scale of mazda6 to rusty v8 swapped XJS I’m gonna put it somewhere around “nissan sentra se-r”


Kinja'd!!! Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 00:17

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My local dealer had an A5 and an A4. I just checked and both are sold for under 10k. I like the idea. But I also like Doing a  brake job for $60.


Kinja'd!!! Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > bob and john
04/24/2019 at 00:19

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So what we're saying is Jake is actually more dangerous than weapons of mass destruction? 


Kinja'd!!! bob and john > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
04/24/2019 at 00:27

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what i’m saying is with his luck, even the MOST reliable are not safe.

so might as well have fun


Kinja'd!!! CompactLuxuryFan > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 00:53

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F32s have to be getting down there by now, too 


Kinja'd!!! chuck07 > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 01:06

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There’s n othing more expensive than a cheap German car.


Kinja'd!!! sony1492 > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 01:49

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Cross shopped these with the mini, pretty confident I made the wrong choice not getting either this or the a4


Kinja'd!!! Gerry197 > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 02:29

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These prices are just right.

Maybe too expensive depending on what its going to take and fix in the next 2-3 years of ownership.  


Kinja'd!!! Longtime Lurker > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 02:31

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Since everyone else is talking about reliability.

How big of an insurance hit would this be for you compared to either Lexi?


Kinja'd!!! pip bip - choose Corrour > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 06:16

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trust me, NO!

stick with the Mazda. Mazda will be more reliable


Kinja'd!!! Nibby > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 08:00

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RIP Jake


Kinja'd!!! OPPOsaurus WRX > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 08:33

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mmmm cheap Audi.


Kinja'd!!! Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > pip bip - choose Corrour
04/24/2019 at 09:07

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What mazda? My last mazda was the exact opposite of reliable.


Kinja'd!!! Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Longtime Lurker
04/24/2019 at 09:07

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Probably completely unbearable, considering I can’t afford to insure a 2013 Honda Fit .


Kinja'd!!! Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > CompactLuxuryFan
04/24/2019 at 09:08

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Ok lemme addendum to that: every BMW after the E46 other than the M2 and Z4 are thoroughly uninspiring to me.


Kinja'd!!! pip bip - choose Corrour > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 09:10

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i work at an Audi dealer, i wouldn’t touch them with a 10' pole


Kinja'd!!! Jayhawk Jake > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 09:16

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I don’t know that reliability is really that big of an issue, but when something does break it’ll be expensive. My Mom’s two A5s have been solid, of course they haven’t hit high miles, but when something has gone wrong it has been $$$.

Also I should add that I don’t know how much you’d really like the drive. Might be good with a tune, but definitely more luxury than sport. They are super nice cars though, comfortable and stylish, and the back seat is genuinely us able.


Kinja'd!!! merged-5876237249235911857-hrw8uc > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 09:58

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This is how it starts.... pretty soon you’ve got half cut triple square bits, triple square extension bits, impact bits, because you just never know.... slippery slope my friend. I’m in too deep myself, but it’s not too late for you. You can still save yourself ;). Mighty car mods is modding a Golf R to get somewhere north of 500hp with that 2.0 mill. So there is some interesting potential there. But like I said, it’s still not too late for you....


Kinja'd!!! Vicente Esteve > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 09:58

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Even the 1M?


Kinja'd!!! merged-5876237249235911857-hrw8uc > MrDakka
04/24/2019 at 10:00

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Lmao.  At least my 10 year old German car is naturally aspirated.  Lol.  I’m loving the comments on this post.  All good stuff.


Kinja'd!!! merged-5876237249235911857-hrw8uc > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
04/24/2019 at 10:01

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Makes perfect sense.


Kinja'd!!! merged-5876237249235911857-hrw8uc > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 10:17

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You’ll be fine... just do it... what could possibly go wrong? But you may want to start a slush fund for repair parts, I’d start with $2000, and add to it from there. That should cover a couple repairs. At least you’re only dealing with 4 cylinders, and one throttle body and high pressure fuel pump. It’s a bargain.

*disclaimer* I’m not one to give Audi shopping advice, I have a sickness and evidently don’t like my wallet, but all aluminum and AWD and V10, that makes it all worth it.

Parts are a bit pricey, but there is enough aftermarket support and good vendors out there to support your sickness.  The interior is a great place to be.  So nice.  And they make great highway cruisers.  And with a tune, you’d have a damn fine sporty car to play with.  And you already have the triple squares, so you’re all set.  ;)


Kinja'd!!! Shour, Aloof and Obnoxious > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 11:42

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I still count the A5/S5 as one of the most beautiful FWD/AWD designs ever.

Too bad about their reputation for reliability. 


Kinja'd!!! Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > merged-5876237249235911857-hrw8uc
04/24/2019 at 17:33

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Seriously it’s just... so much car for the money my “how bad could it be” reflexes are kicking in.

What about aftermarket warranties tho? :P


Kinja'd!!! Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Vicente Esteve
04/24/2019 at 17:35

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That’s what I meant. Not M2. Oops


Kinja'd!!! Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To > Jayhawk Jake
04/24/2019 at 17:36

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I’ve heard they handle like doody. Boostang or Gencoupe are both far better options, but I love the way the A5 looks.


Kinja'd!!! Vicente Esteve > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 19:26

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Excuse to post perfection 


Kinja'd!!! merged-5876237249235911857-hrw8uc > Jake - Has Bad Luck So You Don't Have To
04/24/2019 at 21:43

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No idea about the aftermarket warranties. I normally don’t bother. But of the three Audi’s I’ve owned, I only had some warranty left on one of them, it was a CPO S4. And it was dead reliable for the 40k miles I owned it. I had it from 40k to 80k. Before that one I had a 3.6l 07 Q7 with over 60k miles and it was super cheap. Ran that one till over 140k and only repairs were  for a fuel pump and a brake switch.  Now I’m on my 09 S8 bought with just about 50k miles and now I’m nearing 80k.  It’s not been inexpensive to operate or maintain though.  I’m staring down a second intake manifold pull to do an intake valve carbon cleaning.  And I’ve had to replace the oil cooler and might have to replace the trans oil cooler.  Not cheap parts.  And a plug and coil pack replacement is right at about $500 for parts (v10). I’m also looking to replace my second set of valve cover gaskets as well.  But it is what it is.  It’s a big fast German sedan and it’s a blast to drive.  You could say I’m a fan.  But I’ve also amassed a large collection of different sized triple squares and torx bits.  Along with a VAG specific code reader.  So I’ve drank the kool-aid and there’s not much hope left for me.  I’m also eying the D4 gen S8s too, but I don’t think my better half would approve at this point.  Adulting is hard sometimes ;). But I can’t complain.